I had read about this local woman while I was pregnant with my second daughter, and immediately was hit by a ‘I could do that!’ My friend thought I was nuts! I think I could understand the deep desire to be a mother. I had had it my whole life. If I couldn’t conceive I knew I would do ANYTHING and EVERYTHING to be a mom. Including surrogacy. I got it, and felt immediate kinship, and that I could do it. Of course being pregnant meant I wasn’t ready at that time. But the seed was planted.
Over the years I had considered it, but it was never the right timing. One reason or another. Then one night when I was 31, single, and in a good place, I read a magazine article and it renewed my interest, and I began looking into it, researching the legalities, who helps you match etc. In a few short months I was matched and on my way into a journey that was so special and amazing to be a part of.
I was a great candidate for it, with great gyno history, uncomplicated pregnancies etc. First transfer and we were growing a baby!!
It was such an interesting and exciting thing to be a part of, and one which I’m so proud and thankful to have been part of. The parents were there every step of the way, ultrasounds etc. Their baby girl was born a week before the Christmas of 2008. It was a seamless transition for all, I had no emotional attachment issues. I very much felt like I was returning their baby to them, after being entrusted to my care & responsibility to grow for 9 months. I’m very black & white emotion wise, making me a great candidate for this.
Life resumed fairly fast, and I was back to life as I knew it before. However the agency I worked with approached me to be an egg donor for a couple. I was past the best age for it, but I was flagged by the agency for a few reasons. First, I was very gay friendly, and was happy to help a couple create their family. Two, I was that black and white emotional approach, they felt I’d be able to give my eggs and not have residual issues. And lastly, I was ok with a known donor situation. If the resulting life at any point wanted to meet me, their genetic mother, I was open to that.
So began a relationship with two dads, and the journey their family being created. I donated my eggs, and their surrogate grew their boy/girl set of twins. Such an amazing thing to be a part of and watch.
Not long after I was approached to be a donor again, by the clinic. They had a mom who was older and had no more eggs. Who looked VERY similar to me. Introductions were made over email, and so began another journey in family building. The mom was soon pregnant with a boy/girl set of twins. This family did not tell anyone they were using donor eggs, and she carried her twins, as her own. And truly they are hers, grown, and loved into existence by her and her husband.
Part of my story, the surrogacy & egg donations. A part that I could keep private, but I think it’s an important part. It speaks to part of WHO I am.